literature

True Hopelessness

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disturbingcalamity's avatar
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Literature Text

I was asked by somone today what true hopelessness was.
It's when you hide your mouth under your hands because you're too afraid of what it'll say.
It's when you breathe easier through the smoke because suffocating helps your mind feel clear.
It's when you can recall the exact date and time of your biggest regret.
It's when you know every word to the song that once held so much meaning but now only holds memories that make your heart hurt.
It's when you force thoughts away to hide from the pain so they instead invade your dreams.
It's when you wake up panicked, clutching your chest.
It's when you look at that person and have to press against your heart so it doesn't fall out and betray you.
It's when the one person you need is the one person you should stay clear of.
It's the excruciating pain when you think they're better off without you and proven right.
It's when you realise your life is simply an existence you march through, doing everything you think is good for others even if it hurts.
It's when you see who you've become and you don't recognise yourself anymore.
It's when you cut yourself off from the world you love so much because the effort feels like it's breaking your bones and blistering your mind.
That's what true hopelessness is.
© 2013 - 2024 disturbingcalamity
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